The Heart vs. The Mind pt.2 by Matasha Lee

The Heart vs. The Mind pt.2 by Matasha Lee

 There is a war going on, a battle inside of me
That begs for attention.
In my mind, I am a prisoner
But in my heart
I am full of light.
I radiate with a remarkable glow
But my mind is the dark cloud
That refuses to let my heart shine.
I beg, plead, command and direct
My thoughts to obey me
But it laughs at me
As if I have no control or say so
Over who I am
And why I matter.
My heart weeps at my weakness to my mind
I dare to look away from its sorrow
But can't.
I am trapped at the need of me
To speak up
Take up for you
So we can live the best life possible.
I beg to try
My eyes flutter with pain
I can't see to get a grip
While I attempt not to lose all control.
I sit in darkness,
Each time repairing my light
Praying it doesn't go out.
It flickers on and off
As my mind pays attention to when I will be happy again
Only to drag me into a thought
That I'm not as happy as I need to be
And like a drug I am addicted to the downward spiral
Of losing all hope to gain
Nothing
In return.
My body is at war.
I deserve balance.
I deserve peace.