Friday, September 18, 2015

Finding my way through Love by Matasha Lee

We need love like the echo of our last breath
longing for the touch of a heart that ease the weeping
and carry the burden so the load will not be as heavy.
Must one watch the suffering one
and walk by without a look to caress the weariness
that one's heart has gained.
Must we lose our compassion
in a mad world that refuses to acknowledge
that we are all one.
Oh, Lord, ease my mind and heart
that compassion eases each wound within
that I learn to be silent
when I can use my war of words
to destroy.
Father God,
I know you desire us to seek forgiveness like
we use our breath to breathe,
to shower our fellow brothers and sisters with grace.
I know I am not always capable to shut the storm
that rages in my mind
from the dishonesty that I have collected
like dust
and sometimes I can use that
collateral damage
to hurt another
but God, full of merciful love
you do not turn your back on me
and I must choose to do the same
if I dare to witness your glory in my life.
Let me not be ashamed of
leaving my troubles in your hand
even if the words of another
feel like whips to my back.
I have to understand you are my provider
and you will meet every last one of my needs
because of Your love you do not deny me.
You teach me your ways and humble me to learn,
so when one seeks love they will look to me
and through my kindness
I can show  them the way to you.

Thursday, September 17, 2015

The Heart vs. The Mind pt.2 by Matasha Lee

The Heart vs. The Mind pt.2 by Matasha Lee

 There is a war going on, a battle inside of me
That begs for attention.
In my mind, I am a prisoner
But in my heart
I am full of light.
I radiate with a remarkable glow
But my mind is the dark cloud
That refuses to let my heart shine.
I beg, plead, command and direct
My thoughts to obey me
But it laughs at me
As if I have no control or say so
Over who I am
And why I matter.
My heart weeps at my weakness to my mind
I dare to look away from its sorrow
But can't.
I am trapped at the need of me
To speak up
Take up for you
So we can live the best life possible.
I beg to try
My eyes flutter with pain
I can't see to get a grip
While I attempt not to lose all control.
I sit in darkness,
Each time repairing my light
Praying it doesn't go out.
It flickers on and off
As my mind pays attention to when I will be happy again
Only to drag me into a thought
That I'm not as happy as I need to be
And like a drug I am addicted to the downward spiral
Of losing all hope to gain
In return.
My body is at war.
I deserve balance.
I deserve peace.

My thoughts (no title)

I do not have to go into the past
To represent the story I desire to tell,
No, the story unfolds before me
And I can't seem to bare the sight
With eyes filled with the sea's complaint.
I ask myself how can I sit and not do a thing?
Was it for me to witness history repeat itself
So, I too can be proven that I can't do anything to stop it.
How can you watch a child wash upon the shore
And a dad go insane to watch his child slip away
Just to escape the madness of what was once considered home
And not show compassion,
But as they face their war
We face our repeat and I feel like I'm in a room spinning.
When the civil rights movement began to boom
And men and women fought for their rights,
Did they have to witness other's tear down their truth
To represent another truth like today!
We know that all lives matter but yet when you turn on the tv,
Enter into a comment section you easily remember that is a lie,
So in defense someone decided to point out that wait let's highlight the lives that need protection like black lives,
But watch the anger that sits and wait for someone to be proud
And remind them they aren't anything and to remember that,
But this isn't an easy crowd to silence
So they overshadow their truth
With another truth that isn't the same war,
So nothing changes
We just have layers and layers of pain,
Nothing being resolved while the screams of justice is weakened
And people rather stand for fifteen minutes of fame
Then to actually heal one another.
But foolery gets more ratings so let the cameras keep rolling!
Ignorance joins the table to eat
While history continues to repeat.

By: Matasha Lee 

Shallow Water by Matasha Lee

Shallow Water by Matasha Lee

Okay, I can do this, let's go!
I'm ready.
I know everything will work out.

Okay, focus, you still got this,
They said you will get rejected,
Dang, that did knock me out a little bit,

But, I can get back up again.
I got this

Wait, okay, maybe I should take another route.
Yeah, I will go this way,
Wow, there are more doors shut here!

God, am I doing the right thing?
Congrats, oh, you got signed today?
Wow, you made $5000 in one day?
I don't think I should focus on my dreams.
I need a job!

Okay, Father forgive me,
I had a weak moment
It won't happen again,

Shit, it happen again,
Bills pilling up,
Kids in need,
They hungry,
Should I keep going?
Oh, you got a new job today,
Wow, is that your new car!
You doing good.

I can't take it anymore
It seems like everyone is making it but me.

You were standing at the shore
When you gave up!
One more step you would have arrived.
You got bent out about what you saw and forgot why you started the journey
In the first place.
You just,
3 feet
When you survived the high waves
Long, sleepless nights,
Nothing put in your path way destroyed you,
But as soon as the storm calmed
You threw up your hands,
And drowned in shallow water.

She needs me by Matasha Lee

She needs me

She fell through the cracks of abandonment
No one understood the way she expressed herself
With screaming and tantrums
From the pressure of her voice
Being restricted and violated.
She attempted,
She tried to make sense of the world
Her life made her dance within,
Spin, twirl,
Show off your smile and
Pretty dresses.
You are so pretty
Yet they deny the scars painted
Upon her skin like art
They hid her circumstances well
Her mask became conformity.
She weakened under the lack of love she received
Even pain pitied her as she would cry herself to sleep.
She felt helpless, but she always drifted into hopelessness.
She waited to grow up to see if the world would be a better place.
If pain actually goes away.
If the Monsters in her closets
Do die.
She grew up to be me,
So I take on the I
In our relationship.
I repair every piece that was broken.
I comfort every hurt she attempted to fix.
I love her for us.
She isn't forgotten.
Her dreams isn't forgotten.
Her love grows in me.
God has secured us both.