Monday, April 27, 2015

Worn Out Shoes

Worn Out Shoes

I love shoes. It is a part of my fashion addiction, and heels, I love heels, but I did not always get the chance to wear heels because I walked, mostly, everywhere I went, and trying to walk in heels to get your children from the bus stop is not a good feeling. I let my pointy toe flats do the walking. Yes, I do not own one pair of tennis shoes. All of my shoes are dressy shoes, but with walking from to and fro, all the time, it puts a strain on them to the point where they become worn out and I have to look for more shoes to wear, or try to make it with holes in the soles of them. I try to look past it and be positive like, Oh, God is blessing me with new shoes, or I must have new shoes on the way. You know speak it into existence. I was grateful that I had shoes on my feet, but with desiring to be known as a fashionista, I couldn’t walk around with torn up shoes.

                The other day I noticed the boots, that my mom gave me, that she so happen to get in the wrong size, now, has a hold in the bottom of the heel. I’ve worn those shoes all the time, so I really didn’t care to see that, and my decent white shoes when they bend back a little you can see them breaking. My pointy toe, black, leather, sandal like shoe has holes in the bottom of them as well. How devastating, right? I mean, these perfect pretty shoes that I adore: white pointy toe flat with straps across the ankle, double strapped, yes, black, suede ankle boots, and black pointy toe flats with a strap, is ready to go into the trash, but I keep holding on to them until I am able to buy me another pair. It is so tragic to say goodbye to shoes that I love and to have to go and find the style again, but my shoes being worn out came at the perfect timing,

God is rearranging my life. He has given me the ability to drive and my opportunity to drive is a story of itself. It seemed as if I would never see the day that I became able to drive my children around by myself without having to get out of the car when it is time to take the car back to whomever I borrowed it from, or from getting out of someone’s car that drove us home. I never thought I would stop hearing the whines and cries of my babies complaining that they no longer desired to walk anymore. I didn’t want to keep playing pretend that we were driving and see the disappointed faces of them knowing that they just wasn’t going to be able to experience the real thing. They wanted to ride in the car with their mommy, alone. They wanted their mommy to take them to school. They wanted to experience what it felt like to be a car rider, and not have to head for the bus every morning or afternoon. My desire was to give them that, but I just didn’t know how. I use to cry and beg, asking God to please, bless me with a car, and it doesn’t have to be the BMW X3 that I desire right now, it can be a small, four door car that is low on gas mileage and I am able to take care of it, and wow, he did just that. He blessed me with a vehicle, yes, you heard me right. He blessed me with an opportunity to drive, and I have taken my babies to school in the car, and even though it is hard to grasp that it is ours and it can’t be taken away from us, my babies and I still have moments of wondering when it will all end, but for the mean time, we are grateful for each experience we are experiencing right now. They are happy to get in the back seat, and they try to take care of the car the best that they can, and they fuss about who will put the gate code in or pump the gas, and it hasn’t even been two weeks, yet.

My boyfriend is the one who was generous enough to give me the car so I can get around and accomplish my dreams. He wishes the best for me, but I know it was only God that placed it on his heart to be a giver, and for that is he truly a blessing in my life, and I thank him dearly for it. I wish him much success because I don’t think he can fathom how much he has help change our lives. The acts of kindness that people choose to show forth are such a major act of love that I can’t explain.


“Beauty walks a mile in her shoes, but no one knows her feet is hurting.”-Matasha Lee

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